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Disclaimer: Please note that the writer is not responsible for dead, boring, mind expanding or dangerous website links and/or software, follow links and install programs at your own risk! Saturday, November 16, 2002
I must confess that I had a secondary motive in bringing up the concept cryptozoological investigations in my last couple of log entries, as a little “incident” that happened November the 8th originally got me thinking about the whole matter.
Actually, incident isn’t quite the proper description, it would be more accurate to say: “my discovery of evidence relating to an apparent cryptozoological incident.” I made the executive decision to not share this incident and evidence thereof until the photographic record was ready to post for public scrutiny. What follows is an exact recounting of what happened. The only alterations to the following photos are slight adjustments in contrast, to make the details stand out. There has been no manipulation or compositing of the content of the images. The evidence was collected on the southern shore of the island, to the west of Murphy’s Point, on the sand beach of the eastern shore of Max Bay, inside the breakwater, about 500 yards from the head of the bay. That day my “team” and I had basically decided to "play hookie" and take some recreational photos, whilst enjoying the freshest air in the world™. It was a bright, sunny day and possibly our last chance to enjoy the south shore before the seasonal roads to the shore become blocked by snow and other winter hazards. The eastern shore of Max Bay was our first destination, the other team members had seen a mother timber wolf and pup on their previous solo mission to this region of the shore. So, we wanted to examine the wet, sandy shore to see if we could spot any wolf tracks and perhaps even catch a glimpse of the elusive wolves themselves. I headed out in front of the team, crossing the sandy shore and following a westerly bearing. The sandy area of the shore is approximately 200 yards across at the moment, due to the extremely low levels of Lake Huron. Examining the ground for various tracks as I wandered slowly, taking my time to soak in the lovely day. The other team members half-followed, about 150 yards behind me, following a more north-western bearing towards to head of the bay. Examining the sand for prints as I walked revealed the “usual suspects”, ATVs, human boot prints, deer, shore birds, etc… However, as I approached the water’s icy edge I noticed something extremely odd: fresh, bare human footprints, which were unusually long and skinny. At this point I will point out that the weather was rather chilly, despite the bright sun. We’re talking November in Canada kiddos, not exactly the time to traipse across cold, wet sand in one’s bare feet, unless you are specifically attempting to catch pneumonia. (And yes, BTW, I know that one doesn’t catch diseases from the cold! I’m just attempting to make a point about the lunacy of running around a half frozen beach whilst barefooted.) 
As you can see the tracks appeared to run in two directions, towards the water, then away from it again. The odd thing is that further investigation for the origin of the prints turned up nothing of interest, such as a “bum” print, where somebody would have sat down to remove their boots. In fact, the other boot tracks in the area appeared to have nothing to do with the bare foot tracks, as they followed a steady and uninterrupted course along the shoreline, heading south, the exact opposite direction of both the bear and bare human prints. Puzzled, I continued to examine the area... I noted some more bare foot prints across a slightly lower and wetter depression in the sand, perhaps this was the answer to my mystery! ...carefully I made my way across the muddy sand. Up until I crossed this depression the only possible explanation that I had for the prints was that they were made by a midget Sasquatch, which had continued it’s journey along the shore by actually entering the frigid water. Perhaps relying on it’s hairy feet for protection from the cold, even though our region really isn’t known for Sasquatch sightings, midget or otherwise. However, what I found across the wet area totally blew me away! 
Following the shoreline south were the meandering prints of what must have been a fairly large black bear (the only species of the Ursus genus which is known to inhabit our island). Two things about these bear prints immediately struck me, first was the fact that they were just about exactly the same age as the bare human prints I discovered. The estimated time frame of which was 4 to 6 hours old, no older, as overnight rains had ceased just that morning. The second thing was that the prints were almost exactly the same depth as the bare human prints, which meant that the Black Bear and Human in question must have been pretty darn close in weight. Comparing these prints to the ones I was leaving in the wet sand, I was able to estimate this weight to be in the area of 280 to 300lbs. The bear prints appeared to have come from quite a ways further south down the shoreline. It seemed quite odd to me that I hadn’t seen any bear tracks when I was just across the wet area to the north, which would have been the logical destination for the tracks. It was then, as I attempted to discern the destination of the bear tracks, that I made my second most shocking discovery of the day: 
That’s right, the Bear prints ended exactly where the human prints appeared to began! In the first picture it appears as if the prints are at slightly opposing angles, but this shot only shows a small part of a larger picture. While the prints were at divergent angles in some cases, they also came to follow the same northerly course after passing through an initial area of “confusion”. With the bare human prints fully taking over from the bear prints just before crossing the wet area. In this print you can also see how the size and depth of the prints is almost perfectly matched. The second picture isn’t as clear, however it does show some of the odd scratches which I also noted from the “changeover region”. It was at this point that I hurriedly waved the rest of the team over to capture the above photographic evidence. So now dear readers, it’s up to you to decide what the most likely cause of these track was. In my opinion, this is pretty strong evidence of some sort of shape-changing creature, most likely a lycanthropy such as a Werebear, changing from bear form to human form as it followed the shoreline north. Or perhaps something even darker, the name of which still strikes fear into the hearts of many aboriginal peoples to this day: The Bearwalker! (You can read more about this novel here.) Alternatively, one could choose to look at these prints in a much more “grounded” manner, perhaps just a coincidence. Some silly bloke wanted to get his feet wet in November, then a couple of hours later a large black bear lumbers along the beach, eventually entering the water and obscuring further tracks. Thusly creating the illusion of something far more interesting. It’s up to you to be the judge, but, before you do so, I would like you to consider one more “small” piece of evidence, which will be revealed in my next log entry, coming soon, to… The Lonely Gunman! posted by Kusari 11:10 PM Wednesday, November 13, 2002
An eerie feeling has crept over my room tonight, whether the entire squad of Rainbow Six is waiting outside of my room this eve, or the door simply has special plans for dinner, I know not. But, it seems wise to leave behind at least a few clues that could lead to my rescue in the event that Château de Hades is planning on serving up some Gunman Soup De Jure for their supper special.
First of all, it’s very important to understand that there is a lot of “suppressed” information floating around our world. But, “suppressed” isn’t the same “eradicated” or “lost forever”, you just have to know which virtual rocks to look under in order to locate the "juicy bits". A great place to start is with the Leading Edge International Research Group, these guys are the masters of digging up suppressed ideas and information. Their site has links to anything and everything you can think of, from Tachyon Capsules, to the upcoming revolution in hydrogen fuel cells, i.e. water powered engines, to the enigmatic concepts of “Matrix V”. For something a little different, let’s jump off the web for a moment and take a look at one of my favourite magazines to read while sipping Frappacinos at Chapters: Nexus. Their tagline of “Behind the News – Health – Big Brother – UFOs – Unexplained – Future Science” pretty much covers it all. I kind of consider Nexus to be like little mini-doses of “You Are Being Lied Too” and all the other “good stuff” form the folks at Disinformation. Just when you thought that Alabama was filled with nothing but yokels comes Transdimensional Technologies. Located in downtown Huntsville, this company definitely has the moniker to suggest that they may just know a little more than they’re letting on. If worse comes to worse and your faithful reporter goes missing, this may be a good place to start looking. Our old buddy Nikola Tesla was responsible for inventing some incredible innovations with electricity and we all know that where there’s inventions, there’s patents! Perhaps these links may be of use in re-discovering some of Tesla’s “lost” dimensional shifting technology. Or, if you’re feeling lucky, you may want to try and invent some of your own dimensional shifting equipment from scratch! Give this paper the once over and then get to work! Just remember, fax machines and toasters make poor time/space/dimensional travel devices! posted by Kusari 1:37 AM Tuesday, November 12, 2002
What day is it?
Tuesday! Oh dear!! Looks like my first trip through the "Door of Somewhat Evil" took a little longer than expected! Unfortunately the Cthulhu aspect of my research hasn’t turned up anything useful about spacetime warping thresholds... So, methinks that it is about time that I turn my attention to the most secret of secret organizations... We’re talking the big leagues here ladies and gentlemen, that’s right! Tonight it's The Lonley Gunman vs. The Government of the United States of Amerika! (Let's Get Ready to RUUUUMMMMBLLLLLLE!) I mean, who else has the mega-resources to conduct research into all sorts of ultra secret and weird technology? Perhaps the most infamous example of Amerikanski spacetime warping experiments is the infamous “Philadelphia Experiment”. Allegedly masterminded (and at the very least, based on technology invented) by Nikola Tesla, radical electromagnetic pioneer, the plan was simple: wrap a small destroyer escort ship, the USS Eldridge, in tons of experimental electromagnetic equipment. The goal was to create the illusion of optical invisibility. Basically “cloaking” the ship by “bending” light around it, a concept first suggested by Eisten’s "Unified Field Theory for Gravitation and Electricity*" published close to 18 years before the USS Eldridge experiments in 1943. So, what happened? Well, they were definitely able to hide the ship! But not just from the eyes of observers, the ship was also cloaked from all radar! Amazing! The experiment was a triumph! But, you’re asking yourselves, why don’t the Amerikanskis have fleets of invisible ships today? (Well, who says they don’t?) According to the popular record, the project was abandoned when the crew of the Eldridge suffered “ill health effects”, such as finding parts of their bodies melded into the metal deck of ship. (Can anyone spell dimensional phasing run amok?) The final nail in the coffin for the experiments came approximately 5 months after the initial “success” when the ship actually “jumped” position in space. Disappearing from the Philadelphia Naval Yard then appearing Norfolk, Virginia seconds later, where it was observed for several minutes, then vanishing once more, only to reappear in it’s original position at The Philadelphia Naval Yard seconds later. Maybe this explains the “Made in the USA sticker” on my door, which is only visible under ultra violet light… *A theory as mysterious as all of the Philadelphia Experiment and Project Rainbow combined, as it seems that it is only ever mentioned in conjunction with these famous conspiracies. Maybe the Amerikanski government has something to hide? Hmmmmmmmmmmm? Fortunately the Redwhiteandbluesskis haven’t quelched all information on the subject (love live the free WWW!) and I was able to dig up lots of useful spacetime warping theories at http://www.grandunification.com/. Take that Amerikanskis! (Just be careful Mr. Nordberg!) I mean, why settle for unifying just Gravity and Electricity when you can unify everything in the universe in one easy to carry theory!? (Except pocket lint, which can only be quantified in a theory outside all of spacetime itself.) posted by Kusari 11:40 PM Sunday, November 10, 2002
For a while now I’ve been thinking that the life of a paranormal investigator would be perfectly suited to my “unique talents”. I mean, I have already proved that I’m quite skilled at making up words, now all I need are some nifty, never before discovered things to create names for and I’d be all set!
Just today I set up a paranormal experiment in my own house… Recently I decided to move my office from one of the small back rooms, to a former bedroom on the west side of the house. The former bedroom is larger and better situated as to not pollute my roommate’s sleeping environment with excess noise. The only problem was that it lacked a proper door to keep in the heat and keep out any uninvited types. (The original door had been removed and stored in the basement several years ago to allow feline access to the bedroom.) Our basement, along with surely housing many Cryptozoological Mysteries, is also quite damp, so upon investigation of possibly reusing the original door I was dismayed to discover that it had pretty much rotted away (and spawned a fine fungal colony). Not really wanting to pay for a brand new door, I was forced to seek out other possible replacements among the flotsam and jetsam of my own house. Further investigation of the only dry corner of my basement quickly revealed a suitable specimen, which the previous owners had made into a makeshift table with a pair of sawhorses. She was a real beauty, most likely original to the house and unlike the original bedroom door, which had been hollow core crappola, this door was solid and rather heavy wood. It took a look scrubbing to restore her beauty and more than a little effort to get her hung correctly in the parallelogram shaped doorway, but I was rather pleased with my newly discovered and resurrected treasure. That’s when I began to think (I know, I know, always dangerous!)… “Why was such a lovely door hidden away in the basement?” “Is it just my imagination or does the intricate design on the antique doorknob look just a little bit like an inverted pentagram?” “And those marks in the old paint, could they be some kind of runic text?” “Could this door possible be cursed? Leading all who pass through its evil into realms of darkness?” I was getting seriously worried at this point, so I decided to do a little research in the area of dimensional travel, just in case I happened to walk through the door one day and end up on the other side of the universe. One of my favorite books about dimensional travel, in this case accomplished through applied mathematics instead of evil doorways, is “The Complete Compleat Enchanter” by L. Sprague De Camp and Fletcher Pratt. De Camp had always been one of my favorite authors, being one of the few capable of writing tales of Conan the Barbarian “worthy” of Robert E. Howard’s barbaric hero (and personal role-model to myself). There is, of course, a great Cthulhulian link between Robert E. Howard and H. P. Lovecraft (always keep at least one eye on writers with initials in their names) that is simply perfect for spawning evil multi-dimension spanning doorways. Time to do some serious Cthulhu research! Or wait a minute, is that possibly a bad idea? Something about “sanity points”? Whatever that means.. Heck! Of all the things I’ve lost in my life, I could hardly claim to miss my mind the most… posted by Kusari 2:39 AM |
